Vippasana Experiences

A man is told that his eyes are blue when he knows they’re brown. He should know, he’s seen through them for 40 years. Just to prove it he looks in the mirror and sees that, in fact, they are blue. At first there’s a sort of shock and bewilderment but that quickly gives way to the calming knowing, perhaps remembrance, that they have always been that way. They didn’t just change. “That’s right…that makes sense. I guess I knew that, somehow. Fascinating, nearly overwhelming but ‘normal’ and anticlimactic and the same time.”

This is the best way I can describe the experiences I have been feeling as my Vipassana meditation practice has been maturing over the past year. The hard work of sitting each day with Right Effort, Right Mindfulness and Right Concentration has provided many initial benefits but, lately, over the past few months, clear deeper insights are beginning to come. I’m certain they’ve always been there, but were not clear, covered up in layers upon layers of delusion that a being’s life inevitably amasses to make life ‘easier.’ Studying Buddhist lessons via multiple authors and traditions provides the base of understanding, surely, but to actually experience first-hand these truths is truly wonderful and vital to really knowing their meanings – intense and quiet at the same time.

1. Annata (not-self) – while sitting before a 4-day meditation retreat, I experienced a deep and powerful focusing of mind yet unattained in previous sits over the past year. The effort and mindfulness worked together allowing my concentration to become as sharp as a knife, cutting through the fetters of my mental habits. A cascade of awareness, like an energy expansion from my core, radiated outwards, expanding physical elements of my body outwards, in concert with the universe in its constant expansion. My body, my concept of solidity, began to lose its definition in my mind. There was no longer skin, hair, organs, bones. Each was experienced not as a concept of a whole, but as aggregate parts. Tissues disappeared and were felt as cells with intercellular void space between them. Their fatty-lipid bilayer holding the nucleus, ancient, primordial mitochondria and all of the cell’s components, along with the massive space between them, was experienced simply as expansion, space and energy. This expansion was realized, then, as a concept for my mind to grasp and deal with the experience, so it too then fell away leaving only direct experience. Now the nucleus and all of its chromosomes, DNA, was experienced as mostly space…seemingly infinite space between physical sub-parts. All that remained of my ‘body’ was subatomic particles interacting via the physical laws of energy and the same immense space that defines, in inverse terms, our universe. One in the same. Always there and never experienced through our five senses, only via our sixth. For an unknown period of time, I was able to experience what I believe to be Samahdi – the pure, focus of attention, undeluded by concept, motivation, or habit thought so that only the experience is known thereby allowing insight to flow. This was a taste of a level of meditation that I can only hope to achieve with more regularity in this lifetime, but don’t expect to. How it came to be during this sit is as of yet unknown to me.

2. Consciousness – During a sit last week, a subtler level of Samahdi, one without the nearly overwhelming experience of energy, expansion, space and dissolution of the body into its aggregates, led to the direct experience of multiple-layered streams of thought and possibly an independent partnering consciousness of them. To better explain this, consider the ocean in its tremendous dark depths. Life exists at all depths but is not directly known by us through our five senses as most all of that life does not emit sound or light enough for our eyes and ears to detect them, yet they are all there moving, interacting, reacting, pushing, pulling, consuming, living, dying, rotting and their aggregate parts being assimilated into new life forms and the ocean floor to become limestone. During this particular sit, my awareness grew and dove to similar depths in my mind which I have not yet experienced in my 40 years. At least 2 deeper layers of thought exist below my daily conscious mind and I doubt that there is a limit to the total number of layers, or depth of the mind. As I maintained the role of a quiet witness, or observer, I watched as random streams of thought floated through the darkness and my mindfulness follow behind it, separate, unattached. These deeper thoughts did not dissolve and lose their power as easily as the more surficial mind habits but, eventually, they fell away. I suspect these depths are more powerful given that the unfocused mind typically allows them to run amuck unchecked. I am hopeful that by witnessing these deeper levels I can uncover habit energies that have affected my existence and gain some form of understanding, acceptance, of what they truly are, which is as of yet to be determined by future insight.

3. No Birth, No Death – Last night, my sit provided me the insight, via direct experience beyond the academic paper pages of Buddhist writings, of all that apparently challenges most Western religious devotees. Mind you, this insight and the academic descriptions of it are not intended to contradict or challenge Western religious teachings, they are simply realizations of existence that stand separate from those Western teachings and are not meant to take their place. For what I believe to have been approximately 10 minutes of somewhat on-again-off-again focus, I experienced the constant flow of change without beginning and end. Each moment was observed as infinitely small and constantly rising and falling in and out of existence. In fact, there was no one true moment to grasp onto, so complete release of grasping habits fell away. When this was clearly understood via experience, Annata was again realized.

An easy mod for winter running

I recently grew tired of chilled feet and having to resort to my road shoes or boardy Goretex trail rigs that are too stiff for road running. I also didn't want to have to spend $125 for a winter shoe that I only use 2-3 months out of the year. I couldn't find a nice running overshoe to fit my ultralight trail runners. So, I purchased the Pearl Izuumi Barrier Shoe Cover for bikers and made some very simple modifications and am able to put them on any of my 6 or 7 other running shoes as I see the need. COST : $50. Cut underfoot/midfoot webbing to separate sides.

Cut out about half of the rubber under the toe to reserve enough to just wrap underfoot.
Wrap to toe rubber under the shoe and pull the overboot tightly back towards the heel.

Fold under the flaps left from slicing the underfoot webbing and insert 2 or so pins through all material. I used a butter knife's flat face to push the pins all the way flush insto the midsole.
I started with the arch, then pinned on the outside edge. For my wife's shoes, I needed to put in about one more pin on each side between the midpoint and te toe to ensure that rig doesn't get lifted of the side of the shoe by snow.
The Pearl Izumi Barriers have a velcro closure on the heel allowing you to access the shoe and finish affixing the rig to your warm feet. It's easy to pul the pins shown with a breadknife and switch to another pair of shoes.

Aspirations

As I exit my 1.5 month "off season" and begin setting up various training schedules, I have decided to write down some aspirations for the next 10 months (thereby making me more accountable):

1. Further develop my Buddhist path of practice with diligence, effort and mindfulness.
2. Continue to work on being a better father, husband, son and friend.
3. Reinvigorate my career and continue developing additional ways to enhance the TC Metro area's natural resource conservationist's skill set and efficiency; do the same for myself.
4. Enter several running races and complete a 26.2-mile road race in under 3:30, a 50-mile trail race in under 10:00 and a 100-mile trail race in under 24:00.
5. Trad-lead 5.11c or better, sport climb 5.12c or better.
6. Climb the Casual Route on Long Peak's Diamond (east face), or similar alpine rock route.

Of course, each one of these bullets would require a short essay to fully describe what each of these aspirations entails (the means at which they will be achieved), but that is better done in future blog entries or discussed in person over a nice meal and a beer.

Four Days

This past weekend I was fortunate enough to be granted the privilege, via lottery entry and my wife's and mom's tag-team care for the kids, to sit, walk and eat in complete silent meditation with 30 others for a four day weekend. It's literally impossible to articulate the personal experience, or course, but, in short, it was a truly beautiful, productive, challenging and powerful way to spend four days. I so look forward to having the opportunity to do it again, except for much longer, in the future.

Common Ground Meditation hosted the retreat and several noble volunteers supported us Yogis during the four days by cooking, organizing and otherwise keeping as many distractions at bay. Mark, as usual, was an absolutely insightful, supportive and brilliant teacher and guide for the entirety of the retreat. His morning guided meditations, his evening Dhamma talks (especially), the small group meetings and the private meeting all lending a grounding effect on the weekend, providing motivation and guidance that was invaluable.

We arrived on Thursday evening for a meal and briefing including some last minute chat time before and during dinner. At the end of dinner came the beginning of Noble Silence, to be observed until Sunday afternoon. We spent the evening meditating and listening to the first of Mark's Dhamma talks. I spent the later evening meditating, looking out into the dark night across the lake from the warmth of the retreat center and though its windows.

We awoke the next morning, as we did the following mornings, to the sound of the wake up bell; a small chime struck every few seconds by a Yogi walking the hallways. What a peaceful and effortless way to wake. So much better and easier than my obnoxious alarm clock back home. By 6:15, earlier for those brave enough, we began our 15 hours of meditation that was spent either in sitting, walking or during meals (the food was incredible).

(photo by Kim Klisch)

On Saturday morning, we walked into the meditation hall and spent our first 45 minutes of the day in meditation. Before entering the hall it was still dark outside. As we exited the hall the sun had come up, shedding light on a glorious new world covered in fresh, huge-flakes of snow. It was gathering in nice pillows on the boughs of the trees, layering thick blankets over the ground and obscuring the complete view of the lake in that magical way that is so alluring to the eye. Although this was a silent retreat, I'm certain I wasn't the only one to accidentally let loose a gasp of joy in response. It was so difficult not to make eye contact with the other Yogis and share the experience beyond what we could, in that silence.

My mind started to finally settle and I was getting the clarity I needed to work on my meditation more productively. That day and the first half of Sunday provided amazing challenges and some rewards for my efforts; the perfect amount for me for my first retreat. Overall, I'd say that the the combination of the four day length, the tremendous effort of the volunteers on our behalf, the food and the guidance of Mark made for just the right experience for me; and I'm certain several others.

I'm so very grateful to have had the support and opportunity to have those four days and look forward to helping other Yogis on future retreats.

A Meeting of Two Masters

Sometime in the early 1970’s, two Buddhist masters met in Cambridge, Massachusetts. One of them, Kalu Rinpoche, was a renowned Tibetan meditation master who had spent many years in solitary retreat in the remote mountain caves of Tibet. The other was Seung Sahn, a Korean Zen master who had recently come to the United States and was supporting himself by working in a Province, Rhode Island, Laundromat, slowly planting the seeds of Zen in the minds of those coming to wash their clothes. At this now famous meeting on enlightened minds, Seung Sahn held up an orange and, in classic Zen dharma combat fashion, demanded, “What is this?”


Kalu Rinpoche just looked at him, wonderingly.


Again Master Seung Sahn asked, “What is this?”


Finally, Rinpoche turned to his translator and asked, “Don’t they have oranges in Korea?”


--Joseph Goldstein, One Dharma, The Emerging Western Buddhism

Battle Creek Single Track

SINGLE TRACK ROUTE OVERVIEW (Note: follow single track through the XX Ski trail area into the woods)

I love Battle Creek. I run Battle Creek. I keep running Battle Creek. I never see other runners at Battle Creek. I'd love to run Battle Creek with others and share my experience. Therefore, I've slapped together a mini-guide to the lovely, technical, hilly single track (NOTE: avoiding the wide ski trails, which are also very nice) of the county park I hold so dear. When I can't get away to Afton or the North Shore. When I want something like the Snowshoe loop of Afton's 25k course, but want more of it. When I want to get ready for moderate length, steep, technical hills akin to the north shore (sans excessive rocks and roots and more realistically runnable), I head to Battle Creek.

ELEVATION PROFILE (Note: data from Garmin 305; +/- 50 ft)

Sure the elevation gain/loss is half that of Afton. But it still provides ample opportunity for ass-whooping good times on its steep hill after hill vector. Think of this course as a condensed Afton, both horizontally and vertically; a step up in grade from Hyland, to be sure, but still runnable in entirety. That is, until you start stacking loops such as what I affectionately refer to as the Dukkha Loop.

The course I have grown to love starts at the visitor's center parking lot. It snobbishly avoids the wide ski trail leaving the lot and takes the nice multi-user single track mountain bike/hiking course 50 feet from the car. Stay on that delicious sinew as it winds through Big Blue Stem and Indian Grass and a small patch of trees until it joins a major ski course. Jeer left for 50 feet and look for a "Do Not Enter" mountain bike sign. Mountain bikers follow a distinct direction on their loops. Since this is a multi-user course, it's best to run against bike traffic (the course here-in described). That being said, I only occasionally need to jump off to the side to allow the passage of our bi-wheeled friends, so don't be too amped up on needing to dive off into the ground cover; the track is under-utilized.

The single track drops down and left via a moderately technical stretch to a nice meander through the ferns and woods. It crosses another major ski track, up and over a log and follows Lower Afton for a jaunt where it veers up and right just short of South Battle Creek Road. Surmount a short hill, drop down the other side and look for your single track through the woods as it winds up a hill on the other side of the major ski trail you'll need to cross. This is is a great warm up hill with some nicely placed stones (thanks mountain bikers) to fortify the slope in one short stretch. Avoid taking a faint track left down a ridge/spine that would lead back to the ski trail. Top out onto another major ski tack and take a left, downhill. Follow this major artery for 0.15 miles to a somewhat inobvious abrupt left jaunt down single track towards South Battle Creek Road. If you miss this, continung on the ski trail brings you to Battle Creek Elementary and more Hyland Park-esk ski trail.

Cross South Battle Creek Road and head to the right for 75 feet to a chained off trail head and jump it (don't worry, the chain droops nearly to the ground - even my 40 yr old butt can leap this obstacle). Veer left at the immediate Y. This path takes you around the souhteast side of "Hole in the Prairie." Follow this track to a T-intersection and go left. I like to then opt for the nice little technical footing track that drops off to the right within about 50 feet of the T. This brings you to the top of the "Garnet Canyon Primer" (a much, oh so severely, reduced switchback trail of the approach to the Lower Saddle of the Grand Teton's infamous 26, or so, major switchbacks, but hey, I like grand descriptions). Drop down this fun section sticking to the major trails (avoid short circuits that cause erosion - don't be lazy). Touch the "Blarney Stone" (a nylon post at the trail's junction with Point Douglas Road south) and turn around. Go back up hill. Do not collect $200.


GARNET CANYON PRIMER - Northern perspective (note: at places in these photo overlays, the GPS data shows two tracks; that's an artifact of the innacuracy of the GPS not lining up the return or second lap I ran in that area)

Gallivant back to the T and go left, this time. This whole area is currently under ecological restoration. In another 10 years, this will be, hopefully, a terrific example of Oak Savanna...be patient and, in the mean time, watch out for 1-2 inch dia. stumps. The track fades into woodland now and switches back, then drops to the top of a major switch back mountain bike track that looks way too fun. Consider taking up mountain biking as you express your best discipline by staying center, then right on all possible tacks. Exit the roller coaster at a nice boulder as you spill out onto pavement (road runners: this pavement trail is an EXCELLENT running course that starts at the Point Douglas Rd parking lot and goes up through the park along the Battle Creek itself all the way to the water park and picnic grounds. It then joins nice, easy trail running through areas including a dog park - check it out).

DUKKHA LOOP - Northeast perspective. North Shore Primer descends/ascends slope on left of view

OK, now that we're warmed up, run across the parking lot and catch the sandy single track right of the biking path's tunnel under Hwy 61. Perform a graceful switchback back uphill, to right, to catch the main hiking trail avoiding a faint mountain bike trail off left and a rock step; also left. Shortly after the trail veers left, away from the parking lot, catch a lesser groomed trail to the left. You've missed it if you hit stairs uphill. This neat mountain bike trail (signed) contours languidly, at first, up the west side of the bluff. You'll do one rising slope, a switchback to the right, then one to the left, rise up a slope and then catch a left at the next switchback. Instead of taking the switchback to the right, jaunt fearlessly to the left. Your legs are massive.

Follow this track to a crossing with another single track. Continue through this, straight. Don't go right. Don't go left. Right takes you backwards towards the stairs I mentioned earlier. Left dead-ends at an overlook (nice photo opp). Drop down the eroded track/gully wash down, down, despairingly down, ducking under and jumping over possible dead fall, until you bottom out on an abandoned asphalt road that nature is successfully reclaiming; albeit by primary colonizing weeds (avert your eyes Jason and Amy). Sternly let loose a gruff vocalization and head back up the North Shore Primer.

When you return to the intersection of single tracks described earlier, take a left to join the main track. You'll need to take one more immediate left to avoid returning to the parking lot at the end of Point Douglas Rd. Diligently follow this track up short, steep, loose, root-bound trails, keeping right at all times for full flavor. Summit at an old concrete foundation for what was once, I imagine, a look out tower or ski jump. Keep right and drop down steep sand (watch for poison ivy especially late in the summer). Avoid any paths to left. One or two less frequented trails drop down prematurely to the asphalt bike/walking path on the right, so stay on the main trail following a beautiful, casual single track down a nice rib and contour until you spill out onto the asphalt.

DUKKHA LOOP - Southwest perspective

Immediately across from you, on the other side of the asphalt path, you'll see a tempting, sandy single track rising through the Smooth Brome (Jason, Amy, settle now - in good time) grass....avoid temptation. Instead, take a right on the asphalt. Begrudgingly follow it until it crosses the Creek (0.15 miles) where you'll see signage for the mountain bike path at the edge of the woods. Take a left into the woods here and cross an immediate single track, then left to catch the main trail up and out of the last major hill of the Dukkha Loop. Run, or power walk, up this nice hill to its summit at a Y.

If you want another 2 mile repeat of the Dukkha Loop take a right. Follow it, keeping to the right, a short distance to reach the point where you started dropping down the Mountain Bike Switchback trail you already descended earlier. Repeat the loop. Way to go! Repeat as necessary until you feel your father would be proud of you.

When you're done with the Dukkha loop, take the exit pitch Y to the left to escape the perils. Follow this back to South Battle Creek Road and reverse the warm up section described earlier.

The running at Battle Creek is more technical than most trail running within 45 minutes drive of the Twin Cities. If you you stick to the single track and avoid the ski trails you'll enjoy the flavor of Afton's Snowshoe loop. The hills a steeper than Hyland but shorter than Afton so it fits nicely between the two somewhat polar opposites of trail running styles. I love the combo of technicality, steep yet not insane hills and proximity to home. It is not the place to log major log days, hoverer, unless you're needing the mental training of repeating loops such as the Dukkha Loop. For really long days, I'd recommend doing the route as described with one repeat of the Dukkha loop per lap. Maybe adding a second or third go at the Garnet Canyon or North Shore Primer would be beneficial for those heading to the Superior Trail Races or other gnarly races. Probably too steeply hilly for Leadville, or similar, training.

I sincerely hope this posting provides you an experience close to what I keep having at Battle Creek. Contact me any time for a run.

Louisville Swamp WMA 13-14 miler

My proposed 13-14 mile running loop at Louisville Swamp WMA. See Blog entry below ("Misty Morning Hop") for a run report and photos.